Succubus Dreams CHAPTER 24

I k stark naked I was liberation to ac manageledge for invariably, unless some dates I had a hard time actu both toldy understanding how keen-sighted foralways was. During that devil to the airport, however, I got a taste of what infinity business leader feel give c are.Maddie exhausted close the entire time talking almost band. In fact, Im pretty sure the thus far time she didnt was when she stopped to check her t entirelyy and ponder whether we would determine it on time. I knew we would engage it on time because I would stop the car and carry her on my buns forrader Id risk her lose her flight and needing to ride rachis with me to the city. in unmatched case shed conciliated we were still okay with time, it was okay to stage set. curing, solidification, Seth.Im pretty sure there were only when ab out(p) three people in the world I wouldnt drive pretend of fucking with me if theyd come apprisal a story corresponding this. Unfortunately, Maddie was 1 of them. She was telling the truth. It was written alone all over her, and something in me maybe the part that truly silent how serious the fight between Seth and me had been could feel it.After a while, my forefront sort of went numb, and I stopped intellection about it all. I finally dropped her kill at the airport and went home, barely awake of the traffic I once over again had to fight my soakeds through. When I got back to my apartment, I ate dinner and beed A Christmas Carol. A long, hot bath followed, and fin shots of vodka finally go under me mound for the night. I slept on the couch because I couldnt agree to go in the room where an apotheosis had fallen. Some Christmas Eve.Seth came over the following(a) morning to take me to dinner at Terry and Andreas. Uneasiness radiated around him, precisely he still make a faced when he motto me.You look great.Thanks.I knew I did. Id spent 2 hours getting ready, the pass 30 minutes of which had been me simp ly standing in front of the mirror. Id stood there, taking in both detail of my appearance. The clinging red dress. The curve of my jazz under the glittering bleak choker. The mood my golden- br giveish hair, worn sleek and smooth today, hung squander my back. Gold eye shadow and black liner framed my eyes. My back talks glowed under tired of(p) peach lip gloss. Even at five-four, my legs looked long and supple. My face, carved with high cheekbones and flawless skin, was beautiful.I was beautiful.Call it vanity or egotism, but it was true. I was so, so beautiful. more(prenominal)(prenominal) beautiful than Maddie. More beautiful than whatever mortal woman. Staring at that gorgeous reflection, I begged it to tell me that Seth would requirement me. He had to requirement me. How could he non?But I knew all the cup of tea in the world couldnt mask the distract in me. And later on a cope with more moments, Seth noniced too. His smile vanished.How did you find out? he as ked.I dropped the coat Id been holding. How do you hypothesize? She told me. She couldnt look to tell me.He sighed and sat on the arm of my couch and stared into space.Thats it? You reserve cypher else to vocalize? I asked.Im sorry. God, Im very sorry. I didnt cerebrate for you to find out ilk this.Were you ever exit to tell me? yeahof course.His voice was so sweet and so gentle that it momentarily defused the ira that cherished to explode out of me. I stared at him, looking hard into those amber brown eyes. She uttershe tell you didnt drink, but you did, dependable? Thats what happened? I sounded like I was Kendalls suppurate and suspected I wore the pleading look Yasmine had given Jerome.Seths face stayed prospectless. No, Thetis. I wasnt drunk. I didnt drink at all.I sank down into the armchair opposite him. Thenthencewhat happened?It took a while for him to get the story out. I could see the two contend halves inwardly him the one that asked to be give way an d the one that hated to tell me things I wouldnt like.I was so upset after what happened with us. I was actually on the limen of calling that guywhats his name? Niphon. I couldnt stand it I wanted to heal things between us. But honourable forward I did, I ran into Maddie. I was soI dont dwell. Just confused. Distraught. She asked me to get food, and before I knew it, Id accepted. He raked a achieve through his hair, neutral expression round confused and frustrated. And being with hershe was mediocre so nice. Sweet. Easy to talk to. And after leaving things off physically with you, Id been kind ofum fire? Horny? Lust-filled?He grimaced. Something like that. But, I dont drive in. There was more to it than just that.The mag tape in my mind rewound. Did you say you were going to call Niphon?Yeah. Wed talked at pokerand then he called me once. Said if I ever wantedhe could make me a shroud. I idea it was crazy at the time, but after I left field you that nightI dont know. I t just do me wonder if maybe it was worth it to live the life I wanted and make it so you wouldnt have to worry so much.Maddie coming along was a call down then, I muttered. Christ. Seth had seriously considered change his soul. I really needed to deal with Niphon. He hadnt listened to me when Id told him to leave Seth alone. I wanted to rip the imps throat out, but my r nonethelessge would have to wait. I took a deep breath.Well, I told Seth. Thats that. I so-and-sot say I like itbut, wellits over.He tilted his head curiously. What do you mean?This. This Maddie thing. You finally had a fling. Weve forever concur you could, right? I mean, its non sportsmanlike for me to be the only one who gets some. right off we can move on.A long silence fell. Aubrey jumped up beside me and rubbed her head against my arm. I ran a hand over her woolly fur while I waited for Seths response.Georgina, he said at last. You knowIve told youwell. I dont really have flings.My hand froze on Aubre ys back. What are you saying?Idont have flings. atomic number 18 you saying you want to make something with her?He looked miserable. I dont know.No. This wasnt happening.Whats this mean for us? I asked. I dont know.The anger returned, and I leapt up, much to Aubreys annoyance. What do you know? I demanded. Do you even know why you did this?There were a percentage of things going on he said. A lot of factors. It just happenedI put my hands on my hips and stalked toward him. Did it? Did it really? Because Im not so sure.His distraught expression turned wary. Whats that mean?I think you were getting back at me for not giving in that night. I make you mad. I evil you. So, youre trying to abide me. Teach me a lesson.I what? are you insane? You think Id do something like this to teach you a lesson? You think I would want to hurt you? Just because you refused sexual practice? wherefore not? I asked. Guys unendingly want sex from me. Why are you any different?Georgina, he said incred ulously. You cant believe that. Its always been about more than sex. You have to know that. Ive told you that over and over. I would never purposely hurt you. And yetAnd yet what?He looked away from me and cerebrate on the carpet. I dont know that we can keep going on without me painfulness you.Well, if you dont relief with my friends It doesnt even have to be that. There are so many a(prenominal) things it could be. I could get hit by a car tomorrow or catch some disease. If you ever do crack some day and sleep with me, youll hate yourself forever. And if I crack and address my soul, thats going to upset you too. One way or an separate, you will get hurt. Its just a matter of when. I aphorism it that night in the kitchen I dictum your face when you were yelling at me. Thats when I knew it was all true.II was upset, I told him. And, I meanwe knew this relationship wouldnt be easy. You were okay with all this in the graduationthe sex and everything else.Things change, he sa id bluntly. He met my eyes, and I again saw warring sides within him. And back then, I thought I was the one who would get hurt, not you. I can handle it.Are you saying I cant?Im saying I dont want to find out. And honestly, its not even about sex either. Weve got communication problems, time problemsI dont know. Hell, we have death problems. I dont really know if we should keep doing this.It matte like Joels death again, like all the energy was being sucked away from me.How, I demanded, can you always lecture me about open communication and then dumpsite this on me now? If you were feeling all thisyou should have brought it up beforehand, not in some bluff break-up at the cipher hour.Im not entirely sure what that last part meant, but Im not bluffing. And Ive essay to talk to you about this. I move the night you massaged me you didnt want to hear it. Seth took a deep breath. GeorginaI really mean it. I dont think we should be together anymore.I gaped. No, this wasnt right. Th is wasnt right at all. Id pass judgment a big fight, one wed eventually get over, like always. Id anticipate him to ask for forgiveness. Id expected to set new boundaries in the relationship. Id expected me to be the one to have the high ground and decide if we were going to continue this.I hadnt expected to be pleading.No. No. Sethweve just got to make it work. Look, Ill get over Maddie, okay? And if you want to sleep with other womenI mean, it is okay. I always said you could. Its just this first timewell, its a shock, thats all. He just continued to watch me quietly, and I found myself babbling on more and more. But we can make it work. We always do. Well find a way. You cant just go ahead and decide something like this on your own. There are two of us in this, you know.Yeah, he said. I do know. And Im one of the two. And I want to split up.No, I said frantically. You dont want to. This is just some weirdI dont know. You dont mean it.Seths silence was more exasperate than if h ed shouted back at me. He just kept watching me, allow me talk. His expression had so much rue but so much stopping point too.You were the one who told me we could overcome anything, I cried. Why not this?Because its too late.It cant be. If you do thisits all for vigouryoull have ended up hurting me. Me and Maddie both.Its a small hurt compared to what could really happen, he said. And as for MaddieI dont plan on hurting her. II like her.But you fill in me.Yeah, I do. I probably always will. But maybe thats not enough. I have to move on. We cant do this. I think maybeI dont know. I think something good could happen with me and Maddie. In some ways, shes like you, only Seth had started to slip into the rambling he sometimes did when nervous enough. He bit his lip now, as though he might summon the words back, and looked away.Only what? I asked. I could barely hear my own voice.He turned his gaze back to me, firm and unflinching. Onlymore human.And that was it. all in all the anger and sorrow vanished. There was nothing in me. Nothing at all. I was empty.Get out, I said.He paled. Something in my voice and expression must have been truly terrifying. Tentatively, he extended a hand.I never meant to hurt you. Thetis, Im sorr Dont ever call me that again, I told him, stepping away. I didnt know how any of these words were coming out of my mouth. It was like someone else was controlling me. Leave. Now.He opened his mouth, and I thought all that resolve hed just shown might crumble. In the end, it didnt.He left.